Ways To Build Back Relationships

Building back relationships with ex partners is always a sophisticated process, so before going on any further, take a moment to think about what went wrong the first time around, and why this time is going to be any different.

It may well be that you are focusing on the positives in the relationship because of your needs, and that is also causing you to forget the negatives. Or it may be that you thought everything was great, but it wasn't working so well for your ex. Either way you need to look at the relationship and work out what went wrong, and find ways to get the problems fixed. If you don't do this step, then you are putting yourself down the same path to a break up once again.

Three are two possible situations that could have caused your relationship to break up the last time. Firstly, you are the one who called it off or secondly she was the one. The third situation which I called it "the mutual decision" is actually a non-existent situation in my opinion. In most cases, one party will always initiate the 'break up'. It is almost rarely that two people at exactly the same time will switch from being happy with each other to wanting to end that relationship. The way to get back together is largely going to depend a lot on how you broke up in the first place.

If you were the one to call it off, then may I suggest that you approach the restoration process carefully. I assumed that she will most likely be very hurt after the relationship has ended, so to ask her to put herself in that position again is going to be extremely difficult. Therefore you need to allow her time and space and most importantly to be patient.

The restoration process involves swallowing some pride on your part. You need to admit that you were wrong to call it off in the first place. A good way of doing this is to say something along the lines of "I am really sorry for what has happened, I was wrong to have initiated that, you know, I really miss the (insert something she likes here) we used to do." Depending on her response you have in fact open yourself for a new 'first' date.

If she was the one who has asked for the split up, you have to approach this process in a different manner. In this occasion, there will most likely be something about you or the situation that she upset with. You need to find them out and then made the necessary changes in yourself or the situation and you would have won half the battle.

Having done that, you will have to let her know of the changed situation, re-established communication with her and show her how things will be different and taking ways to convince her that getting back together is the best thing both of you can ever have.

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